Bluebell Walk

 

what more can I say?

Manassas National Battlefield Park (Bull Run)

Where to begin?

I just caught up with reading several of my favorite blogs and thought to myself that I had better get on the stick with my blog or even my kids would stop reading me. It has been an interesting spring  - to say the least and it feels like we are marching straight into summer.

Several weeks ago I had the opportunity (or perhaps I should say - made the time) to go and visit a new friends of mine on her beautiful farm in the Shenandoah. I only met this kindred spirit a few summers ago while working at the CSA (Stoney Lonesome Farm) but it has been fun to discover that we have a lot of the same dreams and we keep finding "another thing in common." So it was a complete joy to drive down to see her place. It was beautiful as the pictures show. We had a delightful lunch and visit and I cant wait to go back and see how she is making headway carving out her dream spot.

wouldn't you love to wake up to this view?

Other things I have been busy with include my little gardens. Hours and hours have been spent cleaning up and moving and starting new plants. Our plans are so up in the air that it is hard to know what to do with gardens and such but I decided if I got it all in early then I'd have to be able to at least enjoy some of it should we pick up and move this summer. So the vegetable garden is planted and flowers are seeded and it's been great therapy as well as good exercise.

dianthus are gorgeous and you can see the peas and radishes in the background

 

I have a lot of things in containers so I can move them with me,

including my strawberry plants, tomatoes and peppers

Which is a great segue into the 100 day challenge which ended this past week. While I did not reach my goal of 25 lbs. I did lose 20 and learned quite a lot - about stress and plateaus especially. I plan to start the next "100 days" in May which will take me to mid-August. My goal is another 20 but I've learned that it's not really about the numbers. Other ways I've noticed success:

• my rings come off my fingers - seriously that is very exciting. They've been stuck on there for a long time.
• I've lost almost 5 inches overall - which is noticeable on some items of clothes - shirts hang looser and pants  have to be dried so they aren't quite so stretchy on the second day of wear
• 20 lbs is 1 pants size! That was fun!
• Food choices are easier. A sweet dessert doesn't sit so well. I don't crave chocolate quite as badly and I go several days between fountain diet cokes. I am aiming to cut them out completely and don't even keep it in the house anymore. Even bigger changes are the number of meatless meals we eat and to reward ourselves for eating healthy we eat "better" foods.

 
So we'll give it another go and this time hopefully no bursitis and the exercise can be a bigger focus without restrictions. I do have some before and I need to take an after for round one.

coming soon - Birthdays and Bluebells..................

Finding Treasures

 
We pulled a trailer home filled with furniture and boxes of "stuff" this past weekend. I have no idea where it's all going, but I have been enjoying the process and the trip down memory lane.
The most fun I had was with a box full of recipes. At first glance it looked like lots of newspaper and magazine clippings - and there was plenty of that but as I dug a little further I began to find the treasures - hand written recipe cards from my aunt, my grandmother and my great aunt Emily. My grandmother was known for her fruitcakes and chocolate chip cookies and pound cake. All were included in the box. My great aunt Emily was quite the dessert maker and the box has dozens of her recipes too. My aunt was an adventuresome cook (with an affinity for lima beans as I recall) and what I most enjoy on hers are the notes "Boots say this is very good," "This didn't work out well" etc and pages of hints and clippings on how to improve just about anything. Feels like a jackpot to me in spite of the eye roll from John Deare each time I squealed - oh here is this one - I remember.....

It's fun to know that cooking and baking is a generational passion and I can't wait to make a pound cake and store it on grandma's glass cake plate with the aluminum cover - back to the 50's I go. I also inherited Aunt Emily's cookie press still in its original box - the kind you have to screw the handle on the top to work the disks. A few antique cookie cutters were found as well and an antique nut chopper.
Time to bake a few old favorites and pass the recipes on to the next generation.
Bon Apetit!

 PS Next I get to tackle the box of linens - tablecloths, doilies and handkerchiefs. Squeals of excitement... As they say one man's trash is another man's treasure.

And so life moves on....another Spring

 my mulcher helper delivers another truck full

 spring garden is planted. I think I set a record this time

still working on weeding

 peas are up and making headway

 the orchard is in bloom

stay tuned for more

It is finished.....

Another life has been lived and has now left us. I love to look back through pictures and see a person go from childhood to adulthood. Especially older pictures - I love to make up the stories in my mind. I would have done well to live in the 1920's and 30's, I think, perhaps I over romanticize it. In any event, my aunt has passed from this world to her heavenly home so my days of travel to PA to sit with her are over. I wouldn't trade that time. I learned a lot from her in those final weeks. I spoke at her memorial service - just a short piece and here is what I said.

“Take courage, I feel the bottom and it is firm”

In his classical tale of the spiritual journey, John Bunyan details for us the journey through the River of Death and the entrance of the pilgrim into heaven. I couldn’t help but think of this often during my last few visits with Aunt Vi. During earlier visits she had asked me about some previous speaking engagements I had and as we talked about them she expressed an interest in hearing more. One visit I brought along a written copy and read to her both from my words and from the text. We had a delightful conversation about the expectation of heaven and her assurance that one day soon she would join her Savior and those she loved. That day couldn’t come soon enough as far as she was concerned. During times of intense pain she would request to be read to and we would read the Psalms or her favorite, Colossians, and the Word of God would help to soothe and encourage her in her trial. She was a testimony to me of how God’s Words were her true comfort.

During a particularly trying day at the hospital, undergoing tests that seemed futile to all of us, she said to me, “I wish this was over. I am wasting everybody’s time.” I replied to her, “Aunt Vi – have we brought you any comfort by being here?” “Of course” she said, “Then it is time well spent!” I reminded her. Another time she questioned herself and said “I guess I just don’t have enough courage for this.” But she pressed on and she blessed us by her example of perseverance under trial and by giving us the opportunity to be a blessing to her.

As the final days came, we knew our time with her on this earth was almost over. Holding her hand or softly singing to her was the way in which we could bring comfort. At times she became increasingly agitated, and it took me back to our readings from Pilgrim’s Progress. You see as Christian and Hopeful crossed the River together each had a different response. For Christian it seemed he would drown and the water was swift and the passage terrifying. But for Hopeful, who walked next to Christian, his feet were on firm ground and he could see to the other side. So Hopeful calls out to Christian as he continues to help him stay steady, “Take courage, I feel the bottom and it is firm.” And soon the River is behind them and they are whisked away to Heaven and eternity with Jesus. Oh that we would all have the faith to feel the firm foundation that is Jesus Christ. Aunt Vi had that and she showed it to us through her life and in her dying. We have been blessed to have her in our family and she will be missed.

And so life goes on and slowly we find our new normal without the presence of someone in our lives.

Rest In Peace - Viola Virginia Haney Braun - November 19, 1929 - March 10, 2012

50 before 50

I made this list several years ago - sort of a bucket/project list of things I wanted to do and the goal was to do them before I turned 50. Then I lost the list when our computer went down about a year and a half ago. I couldn't come up with many in my head - shows you how important they were.
THEN.... while cleaning out some files, I came across a print copy of the first 36. Woo hoo I was so excited! Then I read the list and realized I was not very far along. So anyway, I am revamped to get started on my very own bucket list and have renamed it 60 before 60 - that gives me another decade to work on my things. AND I plan to get them all into the computer and saved to something external in case of yet another computer failure.
So the one thing that I can cross off my list is clean and organize the craft room - cuz that's how I found my list to begin with.
Here's a few things I have accomplished or plan to accomplish before I turn 50:
1. plan an awesome birthday trip with some of my favorite people - in the works for April
2. submit photo to a magazine - thank you Bon Apetit for finding me
3. have 20 readers of this blog. Well I have 12 "followers" and I know of many more who read it but don't "follow" so I am quite sure at least 20 people read my blog ....when I actually get around to writing.
4. organize craft room - awesome what you accomplished when you have to get ready to sell your home
5. organize the office  - yup - see above
6. track down a long lost friend or relative (search for birth mother begun and in process)
7. Cook something completely new - experimented with many new grains and new vegetables
8. Sort and purge holiday decor in attic - yay sold my surplus wreaths and swags and bows to the church this past Christmas
9. Write a cookbook - wrote one for Christmas gift for kids of all our holiday favorites and "must have" recipes complete with pictures of making many of these as children
10. Second cookbook is in the works - thanks to my work on the CSA blog
11. Bake something completely new - made olie bollen - a favorite dutch treat and working on perfecting donuts. Not good when another goal is to lose weight

So how about 11 before 50 - not too shabby - 20% and I still have 2 months before "50" so who knows what else I might accomplish............. feeling empowered at the moment

and next blog we'll talk gardening...because I have begun and my little seeds are sprouting

Lessons Learned...

...on Growing Older
Call it what you will but it is the one reality in life that comes for all of us...we grow old. It seems like a hot topic lately with many of my friends - not necessarily about themselves, but thinking through plans for their parents. My brother has a Master's in this topic and he tells me that the average age of the person who moves into a retirement community is 81 - not the 65 that most of these places are planning on and hoping for - altho there are those who do. But most older folk just want to stay in their own home as long as they can. I have been surrounded by this in my family lately with my mother (84) deciding to move to a retirement community and my aunt (83) in a nursing home. Here are a few lessons I have learned as I observe this stage of life and talk through the many ramifications with friends and family.
"Growing old is not for sissies" - I can not tell you how many times I have heard this - about turning 50! But seriously, there is much truth in it. Our bodies wear out. Few things work right and many things do not work well. Take hearing and sight - and they are the easy ones. Perhaps you have trouble reading the fine print and hearing higher pitches (feminine and childish voices) - now imagine not being able to focus on large print and not hearing at all without your hearing aids. It is not for the wimpy but you better get used to the idea - lots of things are going to change and its frustrating. So LOOK at the older generation when you speak and speak loudly and clearly if they ask you too. Stay engaged - there is still plenty to be heard from our elders and much wisdom to soak in from them. And by all means - offer to read if they need or want that kind of help. It is lovely to hear the human voice. Be the eyes and ears.
And along those lines - LISTEN - they have stories to tell from days long ago when they were younger and busy and the stories are grand - even if you've heard it before - so listen - you'll learn things in a new light and by the way - this generation was "Green" long before ours even came up with the term. If you are wise you will LISTEN.
We slow down " I'm not feeling so sure on my feet anymore she confessed, I'm afraid I'm going to fall when no one is around to help." We can't help it - our steps lose their spryness at some point and it becomes harder to get from point A to Point B in the manner to which we are accustomed. And then there are those impatient young people stepping around us or speeding past. Take your time young man, enjoy the moments now because you are strong. Shuffling becomes canes, become walkers, become wheelchairs, become needing assistance to get places. Take your time young lady, Take your time young man, take your time. Slow down and enjoy a more relaxed pace, you who are so confident and steady on your feet."
All that "stuff" we have surrounded ourselves with is just that - "stuff"  - you know it's true - that saying that you can't take it with you. I have a friend (young) who took one look at all the work ahead of him at his parents house that he went home and cleaned out his filing cabinet. Whittled it right down to the essentials and that which would bring a laugh to future generations (a picture here, a paycheck stub there) It certainly gave us a good laugh to think back to what we first earned out of college - and how "rich" we thought we were. And then I think about cleaning out a home that a loved one won't be returning too. Each little momento is a memory - something that meant something to someone at one time. But the story is lost and so it becomes "stuff." And all those valuable things - valuable to whom? Makes me think twice about how much and what to pack as I move to a new house. Don't worry kiddos - you'll get first dibs. And let me tell you the story behind that funny little ceramic dog with the broken arm and the fly attached to his paw. That little dog sat on a shelf at my grandma's house for as long as I can remember and longer. I was pleased to receive it when their estate was divided and I treated it as a true reminder of that big old farm house and their home later in town when they "retired." But then one day my young rambunctious son threw a ball - yes in the house - and hit that dog right off the fireplace mantle. I cried (and probably yelled at him) but a little glue put him back together even though he had a crack. So he sits high up on a shelf now and I still think of my grandparents every time I see it and now I think of my son too, and how he was all boy (and cute to boot). So I keep the silly china dog that's not worth a nickel but I give you permission to toss it when the time comes, if you can.
Being alone does not always mean lonely Now I am probably not expressing this well and maybe I have it all wrong but don't assume that alone means that they are lonely. Visits and chats are great - but it needs to be on their terms and to meet their needs. I have seen visitors turned away by "now is not a good time for a visit" - this a completely legitimate statement. We say we understand that but we don't always understand being sent away - for now. So if you can't plan ahead or make an appointment, when you drop by, at least be kind of enough to say - "I'll try again later then, if that's ok" And be sure you do!
And along those lines - sometimes it's ok to just sit with someone. It was hard for me to learn that my presence was comfort enough. I didn't have to talk, or tell stories, or do something. In fact if she wanted to nap or needed to rest it was perfectly legit. and so she drifted off to sleep and woke again later and we resumed our delightful conversation - and we both had a little rest :)
And on the opposite page - I can get so annoyed sometimes at listening to those long phone calls again -didn't we just talk about this a day or two before? But on the other side of the line is someone who needs to talk - who needs to hear a human voice, who needs conversation spoken to her as a love language. If now is not a good time, say so - but be sure to put that time on your schedule because this one's not about you but about someone who needs YOU - (speaking to the choir here)
There are so many more things I've learned these last few months with friends and family. Just listening to the process from various age vantage points leaves a wealth of information. but I'll close with this and if I shared it before I apologize for the repetition but it's a life lesson in my book and one I learned the hard way by being "too busy" for too long before being invited on this journey.

We had faced a long day of hard tests at the hospital. She said to me - "I am wasting so much of your time" to which I replied, "But have I brought you any comfort by being here?" "Of course" she answered, "I wouldn't want to do this without you." To which I quietly leaned forward and whispered in her ear, "Then it has been time well spent."

If you are blessed with an elderly person in your life, or even those not ready to think of themselves as elderly, I challenge you to spend some time and make a memory - you'll be so glad you did!
Thanks for reading through my chatterings. I know I am not telling you anything new, yet it seemed appropriate to share.

"Playing cards with Grandpop"